in tears
My heart is weeping... for all the people who see and yet not peceive, for those who hear and not listen and those that listen and yet not understand. My heart bleeds for them... When will the time come that people would just choose good over evil? Why is it so easy to choose wrong over right and defend themselves with series of justifications that they themselves knew were all lies? Why can't they see evil?! Why do they choose to close their eyes?! My heart begs for mercy to the Lord for each soul afflicted with these kind of people. But I don't want to neglect them because I now know that they are my responsibility too. Each one of us is our own responsibility. To rebuke, to never be afraid to fight for what is right and what is good and lead all to the right path. But how do I talk to people whose ears are covered? And who held themselves higher than anybody else?
My soul longs for justice. Because they are pressing innocent people down. How many times should an innocent blood be shed so people know their mistakes? How many prophets should come, how many saints should be proclaimed, how many miracles and apparitions should be witnessed for them to live in God's way? Do they need a second time crucifixion of Christ for them to repent? Are we that worthy?! Why have they turned their hearts away? Have they not seen these happenings? Why is it that the older and more important people become the harder it is for them to believe? Why can't they see evil?
I feel sorry for them. And I feel sorry for myself. Because as much as I wanted all souls to go to heaven, as much as I wanted all of us to be saved, it doesn't depend on my choice. And my voice is so small. How can I be heard? What else can I do?
Today, I'm grieving... And my tears won't cease to fall until I get used to the pain. I never thought I would be hurt this much. I just can't bear to see someone so dear being persecuted. And all I can do is weep! Because of injustice. Because of people's selfishness. Because they chose to twist the truth and make their lies their own version of truth. It is unfair. But I am placing all these in God's hands. I know that He Who is to come shall all judge us according to our own measure of judgment. And when that fateful day comes, I could see me weeping again... To all of you who shun the goodness in place for evil!
May all the people who have experience persecution in the name of the Lord be glorified when the end of time comes. May all those who whispered and whimpered in pain calling upon Him be healed. May all those in tears be happy in heaven. And may He forgive us all for being sinners! :(
Comments
As a non-Filipino I know that I will have a very difficult time to understand all the aspects of your culture, but I will try. Also, I will not be humble - as bad as that sounds. I will not be humble when people say "This is how we are, there isn't anything we can do about this", when we talk about corruption in The Philippines or something else. I sometimes like to point out that we from the Nordic countries have ourselves been violent beasts who raped and murdered people when we went on our Viking trips down in Europe.
As a non-Catholic, who also has close relationships with the catholic church and who will marry a Filipina who has a very strong Catholic faith - I sometimes notice things which really rebukes me. Which really makes me wonder "Does it have to be like this"?
I am sorry if I sound strict to you, Frailyn, but I really become angry when you write "And my voice is so small. How can I be heard? What else can I do?". Why do you limit yourself so? Why do you assume that your voice is so small? Why do you assume that your Lord created you an equal to all the others, and yet, he still gave you less powers than them?
We humans were born with some gifts, and some talents. Some spark of life in our chest. The question is what we do with it. What we do with these talents.
I don't think we shall wait for the second coming of Christ for those who do evil to get their judgment.
We should as responsible people do our best to uphold good and combat the evil. We should have courage, and we should dare to trust each other, and also believe that very often, the one we think is evil is maybe just a very confused person who thinks that he or she needs to act like this to survive.
It's like that movie from the Second World War called "Der Untergang" - it is about the last days of Hitler's life. In the movie, we see how Goebbels and his wife are struggling with the issue of what to do with their children. They had 5 or 6 children. The wife then says "There is no life for our children without nazism. So in order to save them from the world without nazism, we will have to kill them ourselves". So they did. They killed the children, and the scene with the poison given to the children is horrible.
I tend to believe in people's good intentions. But, people are also messed up. They lie, because they feel they need to. They cheat, they steal, they wrongly accuse others.
What we need to do is to put light in the areas where there is darkness. Uncover the unfairness when needed, and to point the flashlight on the areas where those twisted minds are doing things in the darkness. Point the flashlight there and let them know 'We see you'.
Now, of course, there are also those who consciously do wrong. They should be fought harder, using the law, and using the moral law. We should never stoop down to their level.
If we accuse someone, we should know. If we don't know, we should investigate. We should also ask questions.
But, far too often, I get the impression that within the Catholic Church, asking questions is seen as 'un-catholic'. Unfortunately.
I hope I am wrong.
I can see God reprimanding me like the way you do. But I as of now, don't know what to do. I don't even know how deep the issue is.
But these things happen for a purpose. Sometimes God uses the greatest pain for us to learn the greatest lesson.
I wish I could light up people's path. I really do.
Thanks again Raymond. God bless you!
-frailyn